Dreaming Merrily, Gently

The clock strikes with the thunderous clap of his hand Time is nonexistent in these palaces of alprazolam
Am i awake, am I only dreaming
 What's this? Idk but it's mine, I'm keeping
Everything as if it were mine already
Let me lay claim to the most deadly
Mechanisms of how to cope
I'm not dead yet, there's still hope...?
When the sun is set upon the day of my life
The eve of the death of the flesh that was mine Looking to the end 
as if it has any kind of meaning
So i need not pretend 
i know how to read the river dreaming
To the horizon gently shall i row my boat
Long since have waters been calm, i failed to stay afloat
Bouyant corpses and ambition, rotted to the bloat Necessity of breath, but the water floods my throat... Good God! It seems as though I am capsized
Sink or swim irrelevant, everyone still dies
Is this what I have made, a submerged reality?
This aquatic dirge, the raging words of this totality
My gut churned like the inundated rapids
In knots and waves, anxiety like a habit
Sometimes I don't think I know what I mean..
I just need a lot of benzodiazepines

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