Want Not

Here I must be, though I don't have a clue. 
I refuse to acknowledge, neither will you.
Wasting my effort and all of this ink.
My will spent for swimming, I'm ready to sink.
I'm ready to goddamn drown.
You've already dragged me all the way down. 
To speak one thing and instead do the other
This back and forth current tears me asunder.
What was the obvious thing I missed?
When you became all the things never wished
When I am wronged, why do you get to be pissed? 
Maybe I take for granted, I'm tired of this...
Make the most of right now, hold on a bit tighter
With future so dark, you'd think now might be brighter
But that must have been valid that one time for you
Make every second count, could be the last ones we do
So it looks like I'm here where everything's misplaced
As much vested in time as all my ink gone to waste...

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